Thank you, Being Brazen, for reminding me that sometimes we forget that there is a bigger picture, and although things seem to have gone wrong, a different direction is not necessarily a bad thing.
I've spent the last 6 months in an "arrangement" with a great guy. I say "arrangement" as we always knew that it won't turn into a committed relationship as he is a man about to embark on travels around the world. I'm 6 years older than him so there is no way I would stop him for going on what will be a once in a lifetime adventure. What we didn't realise was that at this point in both our lives we were exactly perfect.
Haven't had a traumatic break-up a number of years ago, I've been very reluctant to have men promise me anything because they lie (oh don't I sound slightly jaded!) But I'd put the idea of having a meaningful long term relationship in a distant corner of my mind and decided the best way to go about life was pretend to be Samantha from Sex and The City...
It was really hard saying goodbye. He has done wonders for my self confidence and frankly has gone a long way to restoring my confidence in the male species in general. Part of me is gutted that I actually find a guy who is just what I need and he has to leave because our lives are heading in two very different directions.
For a moment I felt like things had gone wrong again. There goes another great guy! But it's actually not a bad thing, with his help I've grown a lot over the last 6 months and the fact that he has left a space in my life encourages me to take that bold step and to go out there and find that long term relationship that I have wanted for so long.
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